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	<title>Anger Management News &#38; Views by Gregory Kyles &#187; Uncategorized</title>
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		<title>Study Reveals the Angriest Americans</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2009/12/05/study-reveals-the-angriest-americans/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 05 Dec 2009 02:28:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[VAndrea Thompson
Senior Writer
LiveScience.com
Anger is more likely among the young, those with children at home, and the less educated, a new study finds.
A national survey of 1,800 Americans aged 18 and older questioned participants on how and when they feel angry in order to build &#8220;a broader social portrait of anger in the United States,&#8221; said [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=381&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p>VAndrea Thompson<br />
Senior Writer<br />
LiveScience.com</p>
<p>Anger is more likely among the young, those with children at home, and the less educated, a new study finds.</p>
<p>A national survey of 1,800 Americans aged 18 and older questioned participants on how and when they feel angry in order to build &#8220;a broader social portrait of anger in the United States,&#8221; said study researcher Scott Schieman, now at the University of Toronto.</p>
<p>These angry emotions range from mild annoyance to yelling and feelings of outrage.</p>
<p>While anger is a normal human emotion, it could be detrimental if you hold on to it too long. And those who express their anger might actually live longer than those who keep it bottled in, one study found.</p>
<p>The results of the survey, conducted in 2005 and to be published next year, showed several key connections to anger.</p>
<p>For one, people under 30 experienced anger of all forms or intensities more frequently than did older adults. This was mainly due to the fact that young people are more likely to be affected by three core stressors that can trigger angry feelings, Schieman said:</p>
<p>Time pressures<br />
Economic hardship<br />
Interpersonal conflict at the workplace</p>
<p>Time pressures had the strongest link to anger, especially low-grade versions termed &#8220;feelings of annoyance,&#8221; the study found.</p>
<p>Those who were under financial strain tended to report higher levels of anger, a connection that could be particularly important in today&#8217;s flagging economy, Schieman noted. The financial influence tended to be stronger among women and younger adults.</p>
<p>Having children was also associated with angry feelings and behaviors, such as yelling, particularly in women, the survey found.</p>
<p>&#8220;There&#8217;s obviously a lot of joys and benefits that come with parenthood,&#8221; but other aspects of parenting, such as having to discipline a misbehaving child, can cause feelings of anger and annoyance, Schieman said.</p>
<p>Those with fewer years of education were also more likely to report feelings of anger and were less likely to respond proactively in a situation that made them angry (for example, talking about what made them angry).</p>
<p>&#8220;It underscores the power of getting more education,&#8221; Schieman said. Education has been linked to feeling more self-control, which could be why those with more education tend to manage their anger more proactively, he told LiveScience.</p>
<p>Schieman&#8217;s findings will be detailed in a chapter of the forthcoming International Handbook of Anger, to be released in January 2010.</p>
<p>Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson ® provider.</p>
<p>Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</p>
<p>Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com/">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.org/">http://www.ami-tx.org</a><br />
<a href="http://www.dvi-tx.com/">http://www.dvi-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</a><br />
Houston, Texas</p>
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		<title>Anger Management for Partner Abuse</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2009/09/14/anger-management-for-partner-abuse/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 14 Sep 2009 03:29:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Have you heard the story of a guy who shot his girlfriend full in the face? Are you aware of her plight as she struggles on without a nose and only the back of her head? Well, she was a victim of partner abuse. If you are a victim of partner abuse get help or [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=377&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p>Have you heard the story of a guy who shot his girlfriend full in the face? Are you aware of her plight as she struggles on without a nose and only the back of her head? Well, she was a victim of partner abuse. If you are a victim of partner abuse get help or get out before it’s too late.</p>
<p>Partner abuse is abuse committed by a spouse, ex-spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend and ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend. Partner abuse also takes place in homosexual relationships (gays and lesbians).</p>
<p>Partner abuse is all about power, control and manipulation. An abusive relationship is multifaceted. It is a blend of emotions like anger, depression, fear, hostility, rage and dependence. It is even more complicated when children are involved. The victim may put up with the abuse for the sake of the children.  </p>
<p>Partner abuse does not just happen overnight. An abusive partner generally displays signs at the very beginning of a relationship. These signs are normally passed off as momentary lapses. Before you realize it, abuse occurs in all its glory and you feel you’ve already invested too much in the relationship to get out. Perhaps, this is the reason why many partners keep going back to abusive relationships before they eventually bail out.  </p>
<p>Abuse among partners takes shape in several ways like physical, verbal, sexual and emotional abuse. Physical abuse involves violence. Raising hands, kicking, pushing, punching and slapping are all forms of physical abuse to partners. Verbal abuse includes screaming and using profanity. Sexual abuse entails forcing sexual relations on an unwilling partner. Emotional abuse involves threatening, blackmail and intimidation.  </p>
<p>The astonishing thing about partner abuse is that it is not restricted to any particular community or echelon of society. Anyone can become an unwitting victim of partner abuse. Affluence, beauty and talent do not assure you of a life free of partner abuse. Celebrities and regular people have fallen prey to partner abuse.</p>
<p>An interesting fact is that most of the abusers are men while the majority of victims are women. Partner abuse can also be extremely traumatic if children are involved. Kids carry emotional scars for years to come and may in turn become abusers themselves. Extreme cases in partner abuse have seen the aggressive partner shooting, burning and even murdering the victim.</p>
<p><strong>Reaching out for help</strong>: Society is changing. Things are no longer being kept under wraps. Abusive cases are being reported as never before. Action by volunteer groups and policemen makes all the difference in the world. If you are a victim of partner abuse, the sensible thing to do is get help immediately. Help for yourself and your abusive partner as well. If things are burgeoning out of control, ask for intervention from the police or take help from a crisis center. If things haven’t gone that far it’s advisable to speak to a friend or relative. If you are an abusive partner, you need counseling sessions to get to the heart of the matter. The best thing to do would be to move out for a few days until your issues are tackled.   </p>
<p><strong>Anger Management and Partner Abuse:</strong> It is observed that abusive partners tend to suffer from anger management issues. Abuse is often the result of buried emotions of anger and rage. Anger by itself is not a primary emotion. It stems out of more basic emotions like insecurity, depression, hopelessness and fear. Perhaps, a childhood traumatic experience that was suppressed causes an abuser to behave in this fashion. He could be a victim of abuse himself when he was a child. Things become easier once you get to the crux of the matter. If an abusive partner is taught to manage anger, half the battle is won. Anger management in abusive relationships involves expressing feelings and stating needs to release suppressed anxiety and fury.</p>
<p>This writer believes men and/or women who abuse their partners could benefit from an anger management program that focuses on teaching skills in anger management, stress management, assertive communication, and emotional intelligence skills; however anyone who commits <strong>domestic violence</strong> should also be referred to a <strong>Batter’s Prevention and Intervention Program (BIPP)</strong>.</p>
<p style="text-align:center;">Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson ® provider.</p>
<p style="text-align:center;">Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</p>
<p>Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.org">http://www.ami-tx.org</a><br />
<a href="http://www.dvi-tx.com">http://www.dvi-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</a></p>
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		<title>Need Help With Your Anger?</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/25/need-help-with-your-anger/</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 25 Nov 2008 01:24:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[When was the last time you felt really angry? Has it been a month, week, a day, yesterday, an hour ago or do you just feel angry all the time?
 
Anger is not tangible. It’s not something you can get hold of with your bare hands and toss away. Anger may be a symptom of stress, [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=219&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">When was the last time you felt really angry? Has it been a month, week, a day, yesterday, an hour ago or do you just feel angry all the time?</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger is not tangible. It’s not something you can get hold of with your bare hands and toss away. Anger may be a symptom of stress, depression, childhood memories or feelings of low self-esteem. Some people actually take a perverse pleasure in anger because possibly it’s the only time they feel in control of the situation. Anger gives them a high and a sensation of power especially when people are terrified of their tempers.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger is not confined to a particular type of person. Everybody gets angry at sometime or the other. However, the responses and reactions to anger vary from person to person. Why is it that some people rave and rant when angry and others are able to maintain some semblance of composure even if boiling inside? Well, a lot of it depends on our family background, the company we keep and our ability to adjust to everyday stress and pressures. If we come from a household where people scream and yell to make a point, it’s quite possible we’ll end up doing the same if faced with a difficult situation. This is because we subconsciously pick up behavioral patterns and traits from our immediate surroundings.<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Impulsive people are more prone to expressing anger rather violently. They act before they think and repent in leisure. Have you ever had a boss who flings files when he’s angry? Perhaps, you’re one of those employees who everybody avoids because your temper scares the living daylights out of them. Does your partner leave town each time you show signs of throwing a fit? If you find yourself flying off the handle at the least sign of provocation, you might want to consider getting help with anger.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Help With Anger: </span></em></strong><span>If you want to quit interrupting your progress at work and at the domestic front because of bouts of rage, seek help with anger. Anger destroys and devastates. People have recognized the need to start anger management programs to deal with anger related issues. Numerous local social and volunteer groups have begun these programs. They are conducted in groups or on a one-to-one basis. Group therapy involves people facing similar issues expressing feelings, thoughts and experiences. Hypnosis is also advocated by many therapists as a means to control anger. If you don’t want to seek help with your local groups, going online is also a solution. Several online anger management courses are available if you’re not comfortable speaking to people about your issues. Yoga is also a great way to de-stress and unwind as it follows the principles of calm and composure in adverse circumstances. Reading self-help books covering anger related behavioral issues can help to an extent.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Help with Anger through Stress Management: </span></em></strong><span>There is no escape from stress. However, we can’t let stress build up to a point that anger or even rage takes over. Stress management is closely related to anger management. If you can learn to manage stress effectively, anger related issues get resolved automatically. Stress can be managed effectively through a combination of techniques like laughter therapy, meditation, listening to soothing music, watching television and going on a vacation with family and friends. We can certainly minimize what we can’t eliminate altogether. Minimizing stress through successful stress management techniques is a step towards managing and controlling anger.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><span> </span>Effective stress management skills can be learned in an anger management program, for more information visit </span></span><a href="http://www.ami-tx.com/"><span style="font-size:small;color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.com</span></a><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson</span></span></em><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN-IN"> ® </span><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">provider.</span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Gregory A. Kyles</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF</span></span><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN"> </span><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><br />
<span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
</span><a href="http://www.ami-tx.com/"><span style="font-size:small;color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.com</span></a></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><a href="http://www.ami-tx.org/"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.org</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"><br />
</span><a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/"><span style="font-size:small;color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</span></a></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
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		<title>Economic Crises Fuels Stress and Anger</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/17/economic-crises-fuels-stress-and-anger/</link>
		<comments>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/17/economic-crises-fuels-stress-and-anger/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Nov 2008 13:50:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/?p=216</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of the unfortunate consequences of the tragedy of 9/11 was a nationwide increase in the incidence of anger, stress, PTSD, depression, anxiety and substance abuse. Research conducted by the Rand Corporation and the Neuropsychiatric Institute at UCLA Medical Center indicated that the impact of this disaster on vulnerable persons was the same, independent of [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=216&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p>One of the unfortunate consequences of the tragedy of 9/11 was a nationwide increase in the incidence of anger, stress, PTSD, depression, anxiety and substance abuse. Research conducted by the Rand Corporation and the Neuropsychiatric Institute at UCLA Medical Center indicated that the impact of this disaster on vulnerable persons was the same, independent of the proximity to New York or Washington, D.C.</p>
<p>The current worldwide economic crisis is having the same impact as 9/11. Mental health providers, certified anger management providers and family medicine practitioners in the U.S., Canada and Europe are reporting an increase in all of the disorders mentioned above.</p>
<p>Stress is so widespread that even clergy and the faith based community is opting to have select members of their congregations trained and certified in anger management, stress, management, communication and emotional intelligence.</p>
<p>The San Francisco the Pubic Defender, Jeff Adachi, has concluded that the role of the public defender should also include violence prevention and anger management for at-risk youth.</p>
<p>Stress is a common system that serves to create or exacerbate Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, anger, anxiety, depression and substance abuse.</p>
<p>Unlike anxiety, depression, substance abuse and PTSD, anger is not a mental or emotional disorder and is not responsive to counseling, psychotherapy or psychotropic medication. In fact, the American Psychiatric Association maintain that unhealthy anger is a lifestyle issue and therefore not a subject of interest to the APA.</p>
<p>The most appropriate intervention for problem anger, stress, aggressive communication and rage is anger management. Certified Anger Management Facilitators are trained to provide non-psychiatric assessments designed to determine a clients’ level of functioning in recognizing and managing anger, recognizing and managing stress, styles of communication and emotional intelligence. Following the assessment, the client is given a workbook and skill enhancement assignment in all of the areas mentioned above.</p>
<p>For a list of Certified Anger Management Facilitators, <a href="http://www.andersonservices.com/providersus.html">click here</a>.</p>
<p>By George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF <a href="http://www.andersonservices.com">http://www.andersonservices.com</a></p>
<p>Anger Management Institute of Texas is a Certified Anderson &amp; Anderson® Provider</p>
<p>Anger Management Classes and Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.<br />
<a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx">Gregory A. Kyles</a>, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.org">http://www.ami-tx.org</a><br />
<a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</a></p>
 Tagged: Alvin, Amarillo, Anahuac, Anger, Anger Management Classes, Angleton, Assertive Communication, Bay City, Baytown, Beaumont, Bellaire, Bellville, Belton, Big Spring, Brenham, Brownsville, Bryan, Clear Lake Shores, Cleveland, Clute, Columbus, Conroe, Corpus Christi, Dallas, Dayton, Del Rio, Disruptive Physicians, El Paso, Emotional Intelligence, Fort Bend County Texas, Fort Stockton, Fort Worth, Fredericksburg, Freeport, Galveston, Harris County Texas, Hempstead, Houston, Humble, Katy, Kemah, Kingwood, Lake Jackson, Laredo, League City, Liberty, Longview, Lubbock, Lufkin, Marshall, McAllen, Midland, Missouri City, Montgomery County Texas, Nacogdoches, Odessa, Orange, Paris, Pasadena, Pearland, Port Arthur, Prairie View, Richmond, San Angelo, San Antonio, Seabrook, Sealy, Stafford, Stress Management, Sugar Land, Temple, Texarkana, Texas, Texas City, The Woodlands, Tomball, Tyler, Victoria, Waco, Webster, West Columbia, West University Place, Wharton, Wichita Falls, Willis, Woodbranch <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/gocomments/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/comments/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/godelicious/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/delicious/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/gostumble/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/stumble/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/godigg/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/digg/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/goreddit/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/reddit/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/216/" /></a> <img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=216&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" /></div>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Learn to Manage Your Anger</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/13/learn-to-manage-your-anger/</link>
		<comments>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/13/learn-to-manage-your-anger/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Nov 2008 04:41:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Feelings and emotions just happen to us. We cannot rid ourselves of them. All we can do is control the way they influence our lives. The same rule applies to anger. We cannot wish it away but we can manage the way it powers our lives and those around us. 
 
Anger ranges from anything between [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=207&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Feelings and emotions just happen to us. We cannot rid ourselves of them. All we can do is control the way they influence our lives. The same rule applies to anger. We cannot wish it away but we can manage the way it powers our lives and those around us. </span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger ranges from anything between a mild irritation to a full blown temper tantrum. When we are angry we experience a rush of adrenaline to our veins. Certain people also experience a tightening of the jaw, gnashing of teeth and clenching of fists. These are some of our physical responses to anger. Anger, like any other emotion is neither good nor bad. It’s just there and it’s something we need to deal with. The problem occurs when we find it difficult or impossible to manage or regulate our anger.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Being cool and calm when faced with a storm is imperative especially at the workplace. The equations at an office change daily. One day sees you as the blue eyed boy at work. The next day you may be pulled up for something that isn’t your fault. Everyday brings in its wake new challenges and struggles. We get angry because we decide that certain things are unfair. But then not everything in life is fair. </span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Managing anger is an indicator of your ability to deal with stress and pressure. Employees have lost promotions because they failed to deal with a crisis in a dignified manner. Managers who fly off the handle when faced with a calamity fail to retain their staff. Nobody likes to work in an organization where tempers are on a short fuse and everybody’s screaming all the time. Marriages disintegrate because of anger issues. Domestic violence is on the rise thanks to this most primitive of all human emotions.<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Managing Anger: </span></em></strong><span>Desperate situations call for desperate measures. If you find yourself raising your hand each time you feel angry you need to seek help. Now!!!</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Managing anger is crucial for your mental and physical well-being. Many experts say that the first step to managing anger is recognizing it as it occurs. When we are angry we need to acknowledge it. Next, we need to understand why we are angry. Is it something that we can control? Has something fallen short of our expectations? Do we feel that something is unfair? Once you take the time to understand the reason for your anger you will be able to see things in a new light. Then all you need to do is to shift the focus away from your anger and concentrate on finding a solution to the problem. By the time you’ve done this you’ll find your anger fading away. What’s more you can give yourself brownie points for tackling the situation without bursting at the seams.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, yoga and meditation have been advocated by many researchers to manage anger. Enrolling in an anger management class is also an option for those who experience violent fits of rage. Expressing feelings and stating needs are good exercises to release pent-up frustrations. </span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Managing Anger through Assertive Communication: </span></em></strong><span>Assertive communication involves sticking to your convictions while communicating without being offensive. When we are angry we say things that we wouldn’t have said otherwise. Many of these things hurt the people who are close to us. You have to learn to convey thoughts without appearing rude and opinionated. Being angry does not give us the right to fire expletives and attack the opposite person. An aggressive communicator will create arguments rather than find solutions. Passive communicators fail to stand up for themselves and come across as weak and timid. An assertive communicator on the other hand will not let himself be bullied nor will bully someone else. Assertiveness is the key to expressing anger in an effective manner. Hence, managing anger through assertive communication has become the need of the hour.<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><span><span><span style="font-size:small;"> </span></span></span><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN">Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson</span></em></span><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN-IN"> ® </span><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">provider.</span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Gregory A. Kyles</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF</span></span><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN"> </span><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><br />
<span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
</span><a href="http://www.ami-tx.com/"><span style="font-size:small;color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.com</span></a></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><a href="http://www.ami-tx.org/"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.org</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"><br />
</span><a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/"><span style="font-size:small;color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"></p>
<p></span><br />
</span></p>
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		<title>Assertive Communication Tips for Those Who Manage Others</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/12/assertive-communication-tips-for-those-who-manage-others/</link>
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		<pubDate>Wed, 12 Nov 2008 21:53:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/?p=198</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Be Civil: Speak honestly without meanness, viciousness or attack.
Be empathetic and positive: Emphasize outcome and solutions. Choose your words to elevate and  empower your employees. Examine problems and hold your employers and yourself accountable, not  for blame, but for finding solutions.
Speak clearly: Be straightforward, direct, and open.
Listen carefully: Listen to others more than you speak. [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=198&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><ol>
<li>Be Civil: Speak honestly without meanness, viciousness or attack.</li>
<li>Be empathetic and positive: Emphasize outcome and solutions. Choose your words to elevate and  empower your employees. Examine problems and hold your employers and yourself accountable, not  for blame, but for finding solutions.</li>
<li>Speak clearly: Be straightforward, direct, and open.</li>
<li>Listen carefully: Listen to others more than you speak. Listen as though you will be tested on understanding their words.</li>
<li>Be honest: Speak with precision, exactness, and adherence to facts. Be balanced in your use of facts. Observe contextual correctness. Be informative and substantive.</li>
<li>Keep and maintain awareness of the following perspectives: yours, theirs, and that of a neutral party.</li>
</ol>
<p>The above skills can be practiced and enhanced over time, and they will increase the participants’ overall emotional intelligence while reducing the potential for conflict.</p>
<p>By George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP <a href="http://www.andersonservices.com/">http://www.andersonservices.com/</a></p>
<p> “Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson provider.”</p>
<p>Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.org">http://www.ami-tx.org</a><br />
<a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</a></p>
 Tagged: Alvin, Amarillo, Anahuac, Anger, Anger Management Classes, Angleton, Assertive Communication, Bay City, Baytown, Beaumont, Bellaire, Bellville, Belton, Big Spring, Brenham, Brownsville, Bryan, Clear Lake Shores, Cleveland, Clute, Columbus, Conroe, Corpus Christi, Dallas, Dayton, Del Rio, Disruptive Physicians, El Paso, Emotional Intelligence, Fort Bend County Texas, Fort Stockton, Fort Worth, Fredericksburg, Freeport, Galveston, Harris County Texas, Hempstead, Houston, Humble, Katy, Kemah, Kingwood, Lake Jackson, Laredo, League City, Liberty, Longview, Lubbock, Lufkin, Marshall, McAllen, Midland, Missouri City, Montgomery County Texas, Nacogdoches, Odessa, Orange, Paris, Pasadena, Pearland, Port Arthur, Prairie View, Richmond, San Angelo, San Antonio, Seabrook, Sealy, Stafford, Stress Management, Sugar Land, Temple, Texarkana, Texas, Texas City, The Woodlands, Tomball, Tyler, Victoria, Waco, Webster, West Columbia, West University Place, Wharton, Wichita Falls, Willis, Woodbranch <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/gocomments/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/comments/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/godelicious/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/delicious/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/gostumble/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/stumble/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/godigg/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/digg/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/" /></a> <a rel="nofollow" href="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/goreddit/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://feeds.wordpress.com/1.0/reddit/gregorykyles.wordpress.com/198/" /></a> <img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=198&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" /></div>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Angry Employees in the Workplace</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/07/angry-employees-in-the-workplace/</link>
		<comments>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/11/07/angry-employees-in-the-workplace/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Nov 2008 04:43:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/?p=196</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We spend a major portion of our lives at work. No job comes with a stress-free tag. If we want to work we have to accept the stress, pressures and responsibilities associated with it. In simple words, you can’t have your cake and eat it too. The stress and pressure we face at work often [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=196&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">We spend a major portion of our lives at work. No job comes with a stress-free tag. If we want to work we have to accept the stress, pressures and responsibilities associated with it. In simple words, you can’t have your cake and eat it too. The stress and pressure we face at work often gives way to frustration and anger. </span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">No organization can function without manpower. Employees form the heart and soul of any organization. A company with a dynamic workforce can climb heights never scaled before. In contrast, a company which continually finds itself the victim of strikes and lockouts may be forced to shut down. Therefore, it can be said that “<em>The Employee Maketh the Organization.</em>”<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">An angry employee can create havoc in the organization. Angry employees have been known to get violent, damage company property, destroy valuable records and even reveal important trade secrets to the competition. They are found at every level of the hierarchy beginning from line workers to top level executives. Therefore, in present times companies are coming up with ways to deal with this tricky problem. Managers play a crucial rule in resolving issues related to unruly employees.</span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Dealing with an Angry Employee: </span></em></strong><span>When an employee expresses anger it is extremely necessary to tackle it immediately. Managers have to devote some time to this exercise. This exhibits concern for the employee and his feelings. Procrastination can often result in the employee getting out of hand and creating a crisis situation. </span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Sizing up the manner in which angry employees deal with their co-workers may give management valuable insight on how to control the situation.<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">For employees who are always boiling under the surface, anger management classes may be a good idea to prevent them from harming themselves and causing trouble at work. Managers should allow employees to express their grievances without interrupting them.<span>  </span>Interruptions cause strife and may end up creating unnecessary diversions from the main subject. Active listening by managers conveys to the employee that the management is concerned and willing to be objective.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">It is imperative to have proper procedures in place for addressing employee grievances. There should be a box or a register of complaints that disgruntled employees can use to make management aware of their problems. </span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Preferably, the issue should be tackled in private. Many employees have reservations about opening up in front of their colleagues. If the employee is enraged and wants to go head-to-head in public then use tact and diplomacy to deal with him. </span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="font-size:small;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Anger Management for the Angry Employee: </span></em></strong><span>Managers have to be cognizant of the signs of angry employees in the workforce. The early symptoms will include regular late-coming, absenteeism, tardiness and back-biting. Once these signs are recognized, immediate action must be taken. Rather than reprimanding and humiliating the employee, management should make immediate arrangements to invest in Anger Management programs to enable employees cope with their stress and anger related issues. The organization should review its culture and make time for interacting with employees through planning of picnics and parties quarterly or half-yearly. Intermingling with employees in informal settings creates goodwill and understanding. Managing anger among employees is a pre-requisite to boosting their morale and enhancing productivity.</span></span></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson</span></span></em><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN-IN"> ® </span><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">provider.</span></span></em></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx"><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Gregory A. Kyles</span></a><span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF</span></span><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;" lang="EN"> </span><span style="color:#494949;" lang="EN"><br />
<span style="font-size:small;font-family:Times New Roman;">Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
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		<title>The Many Faces Of Anger</title>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 07 Nov 2008 01:16:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Having over thirty years experience as a psychotherapist, I have seen anger expressed in many of its forms, by omission and commission. Usually we have a way of expressing anger that is our signature, that is a way of being angry that we resort to over and over again, when we are in conflict. Habits [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=194&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p>Having over thirty years experience as a psychotherapist, I have seen anger expressed in many of its forms, by omission and commission. Usually we have a way of expressing anger that is our signature, that is a way of being angry that we resort to over and over again, when we are in conflict. Habits have power because usually, we are unaware and we react unconsciously or automatically. Think for instance of where you place your tooth-brush. Every morning you reach in the same direction, without conscious thought unless it has been moved. Moving it breaks the automatic habit, as you become aware and notice you have to reach in a different direction. Many of our daily routines are similar response, i.e. automatic.</p>
<p>Like feelings in general, anger in and of itself is not good or bad. Its just a feeling. Feelings well up in us, as urges to go to the bathroom well up, without conscious invitation. It’s what you do with the feelings that will make a difference in the quality of your life and how it affects those near and dear. Most of us do not know, how to express anger appropriately, we’ve never been taught. Anger is feared, denied, projected and denounced. Often people associate any expression of anger with the extreme end of the spectrum, that of violence. Often and especially in relationships, it is the inability to express anger properly, that can escalate into violence.</p>
<p>On an anger spectrum; at one end we see irritability, grumpiness, negativity, criticism, resentment and judgemental behavior. These are milder forms of anger, but anger nonetheless. Our society seems to be more tolerant of the lesser forms, and our family conditioning allows it. Maybe because it is so prevalent, it is not addressed for what it really is, inappropriate anger. In the middle, is anger that has less intensity and is more amenable to appropriate expression. As it moves towards the other side, we encounter greater intensity as rage, fury, indignation and wrath. These levels of anger indicate on some level, a loss of control, a level of destructiveness verging on madness and violence. Wrath often implies not only rage and moral indignation but also a desire to punish. So where are you on this spectrum? Generally every individual has a troublesome spot. I read a quote from a Master who lived in the mountains. He answered several of life’s hard questions for the inquirer without hesitation. When asked how to handle anger, he broke his walking stick in half and bellowed “Do you think I’d be living alone in this deserted place if I had the answer to that?” Sooner or later we all have to come down from the mountain, and deal with fellow humans in the market place. Someone is invariably going to step on our toe, …. it!!</p>
<p>As a clinician, except for violent people, who take an extreme position and I very seldom work with, it’s the “nice nice’ anger avoiders, or deniers that give me the most trouble. If you are not willing or able to become aware of how you act out or project your anger, its like pulling teeth. They deny their anger, or fear it and fear it in others. They are also more likely to project it onto others. Not me, but them. Often avoiders have since childhood pushed down any version of angry feelings and may not be able to identify how it reveals itself in their lives. Maybe in childhood they were afraid to express, or lived in a violent home where an individual expressing could lead to violence. Nobody helped them differentiate violence from normal levels of dissatisfaction.</p>
<p>Sometimes it’s a woman living the “Christian Way”, who has mistakenly misinterpreted assertiveness and personal power, as aggressive, and non Christian. This is a hard nut to crack. One woman with the above profile, had Bible quote answers for many things including “turning the other cheek”. She however loved to attend boxing matches, and football games. She was videoed by her son, yelling “kill him, kill him” when she got fired up at these public spectator sports. Monday morning she was back to her “other cheek” way. She was unable to connect the dots as to how she projected her denied rage onto others. Her three children felt unheard, and experienced having no permission to express anything that wasn’t sweetness and light in her presence. When they grew to young adulthood, they limited their contact with her. She asked over and over “why are you upset with me?” “I haven’t done anything” She couldn’t express her own anger, and caused her children and others about her to feel guilty when they had their feelings. This mother was in fact a crazy maker, and it was sane of the children to keep their distance. She controlled others and frustrated them with avoidance, forgetting, being self righteous, thwarting plans, being late, etc. This behavior is so nebulous, one can’t get it out of the vapors, and make sense of it. You feel the disconnect with reality, but its hard for the average person to put a finger on exactly what is going on. Even in treatment such people usually have to be in a life altering crisis, to surrender their mask or ego, long enough to see the cracks in their cosmic egg.</p>
<p>I’m much prefer to work with anger that is available. Sometimes it is not pretty, its down right toxic, however its more available for exploration and change, than the suppressed and the denied. Anger is passion which indicates there is energy available for work if a person is ready to change. It is a big “if” due to the fact some people are addicted to anger. In the moment of their explosion, they feel powerful and for others it is a “rush” a high, that makes them feel at least temporarily more alive. The habit of anger then feeds the addiction as they get a surge of adrenalin and other feel good hormones. At this point it becomes more than a bad habit, its emotional excitement. You know of people who create some drama when life evens out. For people who rely on their anger in this way, the intense feelings keep their life from being dull, because they haven’t learned other ways of experiencing personal power.</p>
<p>You and I know that daily we rub up against situations that can if we allow it will trigger our anger. As matter of fact if we reacted to every opportunity to become angry, we’d be constantly angry. How about people who carry a well of shame, a high level of sensitivity and low self esteem. The slightest criticism sets off all three of the above stated characteristics. It can become explosive and blaming as well as projected on to whomever gets in their way. Usually their buttons have been pushed and inside of the raging adult is a child possessed, feeling vulnerable and out of control. Road rage is such an example. “How dare you cut me off, as others cut me off in the past, and I am justified in my rage toward you and a wanting to hurt you.” Of course all of this isn’t thought out, it a reaction to what is smoldering in the persons unconscious. The evidence of what is in the unconscious is the menancing, excessive, out of proportion , out of control behavior.</p>
<p>Some people suffer from black and white thinking, failing to be flexible enough to include others who are different. This concrete way of looking at a the world is quite prevalent in children until the age of reason. Some people get stuck at this level of development, and have a simplistic view of the world. This group spews moralistic anger towards others, when those others have broken the rules. Its as if they have a patent on what is right in the world and in order to protect it, they make others wrong. The offenders are labeled by this self-righteous group as bad, evil, wicked, sinful and deserve to be punished. So if one is different from the tribe, or from the church group, one may be harshly judged. It is interesting at times to look at the lives of the judges of how others should be. The ridigity of the frame they put around how others should live, is often frightening. What is more frightening is that this kind of thinking and anger is very prevalent in out society, at every level, from the highest offices to the person in the street. Such people claim moral superiority.</p>
<p>Hate happens when a person doesn’t resolve anger and allows no window of compassion or forgiveness to enter. Its really a hardened anger when one person decides that another person in totally wrong or evil or both. Its usually the cause of ongoing rumination, in the hater, who despises the offender and won’t let go or soften towards him or her. Sometimes the hater experiences secondary gain by seeing themselves as innocent and a victim.</p>
<p>You may see yourself in one or more of the examples I have given. You may wonder if you are able to change a life long habit of this nature. The first step is to become aware of what you do and how you do it. If you have an intention and willingness to change the way you express anger, it is certainly doable. Next time I’ll start with tools to address different modes of anger and the problems it causes in your life.</p>
<p>By Laura B. Young, LMFT <a href="http://www.LifeResourceCenter.net">http://www.LifeResourceCenter.net</a></p>
<p>Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson ® provider.</p>
<p>Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</p>
<p>Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
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		<title>Effective Help With Your Anger</title>
		<link>http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/2008/10/09/help-with-anger/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Oct 2008 01:13:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[When was the last time you felt really angry? Has it been a month, week, a day, yesterday, an hour ago or do you just feel angry all the time?
Anger is not tangible. It’s not something you can get hold of with your bare hands and toss away. Anger may be a symptom of stress, [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=178&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><div><span style="font-size:12pt;color:#494949;font-family:&quot;"><span style="font-size:12pt;color:#494949;font-family:&quot;"><span style="font-size:12pt;color:#494949;font-family:&quot;"><span><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">When was the last time you felt really angry? Has it been a month, week, a day, yesterday, an hour ago or do you just feel angry all the time?</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger is not tangible. It’s not something you can get hold of with your bare hands and toss away. Anger may be a symptom of stress, depression, childhood memories or feelings of low self-esteem. Some people actually take a perverse pleasure in anger because possibly it’s the only time they feel in control of the situation. Anger gives them a high and a sensation of power especially when people are terrified of their tempers.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger is not confined to a particular type of person. Everybody gets angry at sometime or the other. However, the responses and reactions to anger vary from person to person. Why is it that some people rave and rant when angry and others are able to maintain some semblance of composure even if boiling inside? Well, a lot of it depends on our family background, the company we keep and our ability to adjust to everyday <strong>stress</strong> and pressures. If we come from a household where people scream and yell to make a point, it’s quite possible we’ll end up doing the same if faced with a difficult situation. This is because we subconsciously pick up behavioral patterns and traits from our immediate surroundings.<span>  </span></span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Impulsive people are more prone to expressing anger rather violently. They act before they think and repent in leisure. Have you ever had a boss who flings files when he’s angry? Perhaps, you’re one of those employees who everybody avoids because your temper scares the living daylights out of them. Does your partner leave town each time you show signs of throwing a fit? If you find yourself flying off the handle at the least sign of provocation, you might want to consider getting help with anger.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Help With Anger: </span></em></strong><span>If you want to quit interrupting your progress at work and at the domestic front because of bouts of rage, seek help with anger. Anger destroys and devastates. People have recognized the need to start anger management programs to deal with anger related issues. Numerous local certified anger management providers have begun these programs. They are conducted in groups or on a one-to-one basis which is called Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching. Anger management groups involves people facing similar issues expressing feelings, thoughts and experiences. Yoga is also a great way to de-stress and unwind as it follows the principles of calm and composure in adverse circumstances. Reading self-help books covering anger related behavioral issues can help to an extent, but the best course of action is to attend an anger management class facilitated by a certified anger management facilitator.</span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><strong><em><span>Help with Anger through Stress Management: </span></em></strong><span>There is no escape from stress. However, we can’t let stress build up to a point that anger or even rage takes over. Stress management is closely related to anger management. If you can learn to manage stress effectively, anger related issues get resolved automatically. Stress can be managed effectively through a combination of techniques like laughter therapy, meditation, listening to soothing music, watching television and going on a vacation with family and friends. We can certainly minimize what we can’t eliminate altogether. Minimizing stress through successful stress management techniques is a step towards managing and controlling anger.<span>   </span></span></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><span style="color:#000000;"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson</span></span></em><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;"> ® </span><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">provider.</span></span></em></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;margin:0;" align="center"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</span></span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><em><span style="font-size:10pt;" lang="EN-IN"><span style="color:#000000;font-family:Times New Roman;"> </span></span></em></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:0;"><span style="color:#494949;"><a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx"><span style="color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">Gregory A. Kyles</span></a><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF</span></span><span style="font-size:9pt;font-family:Arial;"><span style="color:#000000;"> </span></span><span style="color:#494949;"><br />
<span style="font-family:Times New Roman;">Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
</span><a href="http://www.ami-tx.com/"><span style="color:#800080;font-family:Times New Roman;">http://www.ami-tx.com</span></a></span></p>
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		<title>An Open Letter to Judges, Prosecuting Attorneys and Human Resource Managers about Anger Management Classes</title>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 09 Oct 2008 00:59:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Gregory Kyles</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com/?p=175</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Person-directed aggression and all forms of rage are dramatically increasing worldwide. While anger management is the most effective intervention for unhealthy anger, the lack of state or local standards poses risks for those in the position to mandate employees or defendants to attend such classes.
Currently, there are no regulations mandated for anger management providers anywhere. [...]<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=gregorykyles.wordpress.com&blog=1408283&post=175&subd=gregorykyles&ref=&feed=1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class='snap_preview'><br /><p>Person-directed aggression and all forms of rage are dramatically increasing worldwide. While anger management is the most effective intervention for unhealthy anger, the lack of state or local standards poses risks for those in the position to mandate employees or defendants to attend such classes.</p>
<p>Currently, there are no regulations mandated for anger management providers anywhere. Consequently, Judges and Human Resource Managers have few guidelines to use in mandating perpetrators of “disruptive behavior” to attend coaching or anger management classes.</p>
<p>One unintended consequence of the absence of state or county standards in this area is the tendency to inappropriately refer such clients to counseling, psychotherapy, or domestic violence providers. According to the American Psychiatric Association, anger is a normal human emotion rather than a nervous or mental disorder. Therefore, anger is not responsive to psychotherapy or psychotropic medication.</p>
<p>Anger is a problem when it:</p>
<p>·Is too intense<br />
·Occurs too frequently<br />
·Lasts too long<br />
·Leads to aggression or violence<br />
·Has health consequences<br />
·Destroys work or personal relationships</p>
<p>Providers of anger management must have a minimum of 40 hours of Facilitator Certification training, 16 hours of continuing education each year, an evidenced based curriculum which includes pre and post tests, client workbooks, CDs, DVDs and other ancillary training materials.</p>
<p>Anger management classes are designed to teach skill enhancement in recognizing and managing anger, stress, assertive communication and increasing empathy or emotional intelligence.</p>
<p>A list of Certified Anger Management Facilitators in the United States and Canada can be found by clicking <a href="http://www.andersonservices.com/providersus.html">here</a>.</p>
<p>By George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF <a href="http://www.andersonservices.com">http://www.andersonservices.com</a></p>
<p>Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson &amp; Anderson ® provider.</p>
<p>Anger Management Classes and Anger Management &#8211; Executive Coaching available in Houston, Texas.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.aaamp.org/MemberDirectory/tabid/162/ctl/Detail/mid/708/xmid/589/xmfid/4/Default.aspx">Gregory A. Kyles</a>, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF<br />
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas<br />
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter<br />
American Association of Anger Management Providers<br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.com">http://www.ami-tx.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.ami-tx.org">http://www.ami-tx.org</a><br />
<a href="http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com">http://gregorykyles.wordpress.com</a><br />
<a href="http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles">http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles</a><br />
<a href="http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert">http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert</a></p>
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