Why Anger Management Skills are Important

Everybody experiences anger at some point of time or the other. A certain degree of anger is normal and healthy. However, if it gets out of control you can harm not only yourself but also those you come into contact with. Anger is probably the most real of all human emotions. It can increase your determination and will-power to reach the heights of success or it can catapult you into the valleys of fury and rage. By itself, anger is not really dangerous to your well-being. Everything depends on how you deal with it.

 

We lead a different life as compared to our fore-fathers. Technology has perhaps improved life in many ways but it has also made it difficult and stressful. We have no time to smell the roses. We always have to do something yesterday, right now, today or tomorrow. This leads to overwhelming pressure and stress. Let’s take an example of the average married man. He wakes up in the morning to rush to work sometimes without breakfast. He travels miles to his workplace only to be reprimanded by his boss for late-coming. During the day he has projects to complete and deadlines to meet, all under his immediate supervisor’s watchful eye. If something goes wrong he is held responsible. He returns in the evening to a mischievous child and a wife who grumbles about his never having the time for her. A squabble follows making him feel stressed out, angry and depressed. And this is an average day in the life of a married man. The bad days are a different story altogether.

 

Anger Management Skills:  In this age of unusual stress and pressure, anger management training is of paramount importance. It teaches you to accept what you can’t change and channel your energy to feel positive and calm. It is important for people from all walks of life to control and manage their anger. Employees must learn to deal with work pressure and demanding supervisors. Bosses should control their feelings of hostility towards perceived inefficient workers. Couples must stop venting their frustrations on each other. Anger management skills training teaches you all this and much more. Organizations must recognize the need to incorporate anger management training into their overall training programs. Expressing feelings must be encouraged and honest feedback should be provided. This will bring about a sense of harmony and increase productivity at the work-place.

 

Stress Management and Anger: Stress and anger are two sides of the same coin. Often, we are angry because we are stressed and vice versa. The causes of stress are many. Demands at the workplace, uncompromising supervisors, inefficient employees, strained relationships, health issues and financial worries are some of these causes. If you can learn to beat the heat and manage stress half the battle is won. There are various techniques that can be used to manage stress. Try deep breathing when faced with a tense situation. Yoga and meditation can also work as stress busters. Therapists endorse exercising as a means to release feel good hormones and do away with stress and tension.

 

All said and done, anger and stress to a certain degree is desirable and healthy. Excessive stress can lead to fits of anger and affect all aspects of life. Managing stress and anger is important for your emotional as well as physical well being.

 

The most effective way in managing your stress and anger is to learn anger and fear control skills by taking an anger management class. It would be most helpful if the classes focused on anger management, stress management, assertive communication, and emotional intelligence.


For additional information about anger and stress management skills please visit
http://www.ami-tx.com . 

Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson & Anderson ® provider.

 

Anger Management Classes available 7 days a week in Houston, Texas.

 

Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter
American Association of Anger Management Providers
http://www.ami-tx.com

 
 
 
 

 

 

North Carolina Anger Management/Conflict Coaching Provider Featured in “Real Simple” Magazine

As a representation of his growing influence in the world of anger management, Carlos Todd, http://www.masteringanger.com has been featured in the Time Inc. magazine “Real Simple.”

Visit http://www.realsimple.com/realsimple/gallery/0,21863,1779636,00.html to read the article titled “16 Ways to Manage Your Anger ” or pick up a copy of Real Simple at a news stand near you.

Anger Management Institute of Texas is a Certified Anderson & Anderson® Provider

Anger Management Classes available 7 days a week in Houston, Texas.

Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter
American Association of Anger Management Providers
http://www.ami-tx.com
http://www.ami-tx.org
https://gregorykyles.wordpress.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles
http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert

Anger is an Energizer

Anger is a natural emotional state and is designed to help us stay alive. Anger sends signals to all parts of our body to help us fight. It energizes us and prepares us for action. Often, the perceived need to protect one-self comes from what amounts to psychological attacks from others.

Use Anger Wisely

When we feel energized by anger, it is smart for us to ask ourselves how we put his energy to its most productive use. As with the use of other forms of energy such as electricity, we want to use it efficiently, not wastefully.

Anger is Secondary

One of the most helpful things to remember about anger is that it is a secondary emotion. A primary feeling is what is felt immediately before we feel angry. We always feel something else first, even if we don’t notice it. We might feel afraid, attacked, offended, disrespected, forced, trapped, interrogated, or pressured. If any of these feelings are intense enough, they can lead to anger before we realize what we really felt!

Identify the Primary Emotion

An important point to remember about secondary feelings such as anger is that they do not identify the unmet emotional need. When all you can say is “I feel angry,” neither you nor any one else knows what would help you feel better. An amazingly simple, but effective, technique is to always identify the primary emotion.

Situations that Cause Anger Can Be Avoided

Here is an example. Assume someone wants us to do something we prefer not to do. At first we feel a little pressured but not enough to get angry. When they keep pushing us, we begin to get irritated. If they continue, we become “angry”.

Communicate Your Feelings

An effective way to avoid getting angry in many cases is simply to express your feeling before it has elevated to the point of anger. This helps keep the brain in balance and out of the more volatile mode where it has downshifted to a more primitive and physiological response.

By George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP http://www.andersonservices.com

Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson & Anderson ® provider.

Anger Management Classes available 7 days a week in Houston, Texas.

Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter
American Association of Anger Management Providers
http://www.ami-tx.com
http://www.ami-tx.org
https://gregorykyles.wordpress.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles
http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert

Anger Management Classes: A Student’s Perspective

From time to time I’m asked to explain what anger management classes are all about, so I decided to post, with her permission, one of my students’ class reviews. Her review explains the positive effects anger management services can have on individuals as well as couples.

1. Did you benefit from taking the classes, if so how?

This class helped Jim and I realize how ineffective and detrimental our communication techniques have been when dealing with conflict between us. We learned how beneficial the constructive interactions are, enabling us to reach agreement, compromise, and state our needs and feelings – resulting in a win-win arrangement. And we’re happy, not angry!

2. Did you find the facilitator (Gregory Kyles) knowledgeable about anger management?

Yes, absolutely. Greg’s training regarding anger as a secondary emotion, and how critical it is that we are aware when we feel a primary emotion is the key to staying calm. Realizing that our actions & feelings might lead to anger and learning how to prevent those feelings from escalating to anger was extremely valuable.

Greg thoroughly reviewed each topic and asked questions. Greg discussed students’ answers and provided insight for each student – often helping a student identify feelings that were buried. Greg is very focused and works with students on their anger problems until they understand how damaging their actions are. He discusses what the student could have done to have a positive outcome. He encourages students to interact with one another in a supportive environment.

3. What did you like about the classes, and what did you dislike?

The group environment (2 – 8 students) was ideal. It is not counseling where couples blame each other and someone is right or wrong. Greg’s class focuses on positive communication styles and helps students understand how stress impacts and strain relationships. Listening to each student’s control log helped us realize we are not alone in losing control with those we love. We identify with each student’s story. Greg and the student review how damaging their actions have been, and offer support and encouragement using positive interactions. Not only have I learned from Greg, but I have learned from other students’ stories and their insight. This class content and presentation is very powerful if we are open to it.

My husband and I took different classes but attended during the same time frame. I highly recommend that couples both attend this seminar at the same time. We benefited from the same new perspective, and we could reinforce (and benefit from) the communication skills we were learning. We were “on the same page”. We are committed to improving our relationship, and through this class, we are learning positive communication techniques together. We consider this seminar similar to a marriage enrichment seminar. We are working to improve our listening skills, focus on our current problem and to take “one step at a time” toward resolution.

I like everything about this class. It doesn’t take long to realize the benefits of positive communication.

4. Would you recommend the program to a family member, co-worker or friends?

Yes, I already have recommended Greg and the anger management seminar to family, friends, and co-workers and supervisors. This class has had a very positive impact on my life.    Sue F.

Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson & Anderson ® provider.

Anger Management Classes available 7 days a week in Houston, Texas.

Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter
American Association of Anger Management Providers
http://www.ami-tx.com
http://www.ami-tx.org
https://gregorykyles.wordpress.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles
http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert

Barriers to Resolving Conflict

Conflict is usually viewed negatively, however conflict is simply an indicator and driving force for change. If handled correctly conflict is the early stage of positive change.

A conflict does not lead to change on its own, but it is the indicator that there is a need and want for change. Conflict resolution is the process of identifying and enacting the change.

But effective resolution is sometimes difficult because conflict, by its very nature attempts to undermine any change. It is by only going through the process of conflict resolution that we can identify where change is needed or even if it is necessary.

Some of the barriers to effective conflict resolution are:

poor communication
poor planning
incorrect assumptions
pre-determined outcomes
Poor Communication

Poor communication not only leads to conflict, but it is the most significant barrier to resolving conflict. Communication is a two-part process, which involves “active” listening and “active” speaking. Both these fundamentals come under pressure during conflict and can break down. How many times do arguments end in silence? How many times do the listeners “switching off” while addressing conflict?

Poor Planning

Conflict resolution takes time and is generally highly emotional. By planning beforehand both parties are in a much better position to discuss issues rather than be caught up in the emotion of the moment. No company would instigate a change in its business model without first researching and preparing a business strategy. Why should your personal life be any different?

Incorrect Assumption

Quite often a conflict will cause people to question the motives of others involved. This can lead to assumptions that are not always accurate. Usually these assumptions are negative so they are either not discussed or not disclosed fully. Once an assumption has been established it is difficult to break because an individual will interpret behaviour in a way as to support their assumptions.

Pre-determine Outcomes

People see conflict as a barrier to change rather than a tool of change because they believe they know what changes are needed. Rather than see conflict as an opportunity to see others’ point of view or idea, people see it as a barrier to getting what they want.

These are just some of the major problems arising from conflict. Each conflict is unique and is determined by the situation, the personalities involved and the level of perceived risk/reward.

The longer a conflict goes on the greater the risk/reward. Conflict usually persists when there is either no change or change in the wrong direction, the longer the conflict runs the greater the need for change. Long-running conflicts are also more difficult to overcome, as barriers tend to snowball.

Barriers will always be a part of conflict. People must identify barriers and work to reduce their impact, thereby realizing positive change.

By Carlos Todd, LPC, NCC, CAMF http://www.masteringanger.com

Anger Management Institute of Texas is a certified Anderson & Anderson ® provider.

Anger Management Classes available 7 days a week in Houston, Texas.

Gregory A. Kyles, M.A., LPC, CEAP, CAMF
Director, Anger Management Institute of Texas
Diplomate, President of Texas Chapter
American Association of Anger Management Providers
http://www.ami-tx.com
http://www.ami-tx.org
https://gregorykyles.wordpress.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/gregorykyles
http://www.myspace.com/anger_management_expert